Called my regular gynae and only to have him replied on WhatsApp…
“Taking off. Reaching at 6pm. Tell them to hold the labor for me”
“I’m already 9cm dilated. Can’t wait for you”
A beeping sound came one and I was told that the epidural has finished. The nurse asked if I would like to have more epidural but it is very likely I won’t be able to finish it (=waste money). So, a more economical choice is make do without epidural.
Dr Tan, the replacement doctor came. He broke my water bag and told me to push. Tried as I might but the push was not sustainable, baby kept sliding backwards. He can’t use suction either, as baby’s head was quite high.
“I’ll leave her alone and hopefully baby’s head will come down. If she still can’t push later, we’ll have to do a c-sect”, I overheard him telling the nurse.
WHAAAAT?? C-sect??? The first thing that came to my mind was money!! $ka-ching, $ka-ching. I’m not going for c-sect! That’s not my plan.
Shortly after Dr Tan left the room, I had the urge to push. I told the nurse and very calmly, she said “okay, let’s try”. And try I did.
Everything that took place next was quite a blur. I was in a lot of pain and had to remind myself to breathe. But that didn’t stop me from comparing how different the situation was on that day and during Elisa’s birth. It was a one man show as compared to Elisa’s-there were 6-7 people in the room; nurses were urging me to push, a lady doctor was pushing my tummy. There was a lot of commotion, it was like a marketplace. I remembered telling C, they were very very noisy. And this time, it was too quiet! Haha!
C was very supportive throughout. He kept urging me on. I don’t remember how many pushes I did and the last time I pushed, the nurse said she could see baby’s head and she asked me to stop pushing!!! She shouted to her colleague “Call the doctor!”
Are you freaking kidding me???? Stop pushing? I’m not taking a dump, you know?
I did try to stop pushing but who are we to go against Mother Nature, in this case a little boy who is so eager to see the world.
“I can’t! I need to push!!!!”
“Okay, push gently. The doctor is coming”
“How to push gently?????”
“I really can’t!!!! I NEED TO PUSH!!!”
“WHERE IS THE DOCTORRRRRRRRRR???”
C said I screamed so loud that my face turned so red he afraid I will explode. He said he has never seen me in this state before. Childbirth is hard, husband!
I was at the verge of spewing expletives. I can feel baby crowning and the burning sensation was horrific with a capital H. At that very moment, I decided to just push. The nurse manager came in and gave the nurse the green light to deliver the baby (this is according to C. I was in pain to notice anything. All I know was I needed to get baby out pronto!) With just one push, I felt his shoulder glided past (best feeling EVER) and the next thing, his cries filled the room.
Half a minute later, Dr Tan came…”Oh, she has delivered the baby”. Yes, I did! He proceeded to cut baby’s umbilical cord (Until today, I’m not sure why C was not asked to cut the cord. Maybe because I did not inform them earlier? But I thought it’s a normal practice to invite baby’s dad to do it?).
The nurse placed baby on my arms and I burst out in tears. My tears just kept flowing, I was sobbing quite badly. C as well but not as bad as me lah. It was such a heartwarming sight, I wished someone had captured that moment! They then whisked him away for checks and to be cleaned. C went along to take a good look at him and took some photos.
“Baby’s weight is 3.984kg” said the nurse.
I was expecting 3.5kg or thereabout. I actually trusted the doctor! Haha.
I delivered the placenta and Dr Tan stitched me up. After all the checks were done, the nurse carried baby over for some skin-to-skin contact. We took some photos and I tried to let baby latch on. He managed to suckle but it wasn’t a proper latch. The nurse left us alone to enjoy the moment with our newborn.
The nurse brought the baby to the nursery and I was wheeled to the maternity ward. After I settled down, C went back home to rest.
I tried to get some shut eye after lunch. Just when I was about to doze off, I received a call from the nursery. I was told that baby was having irregular breathing and he needed to be sent to special care nursery for monitoring. My heart sank and I couldn’t sleep after that.
The paediatrician came to update me about baby. They ran some test and everything seemed normal but they will still keep him in the special care nursery for monitoring.
C came with my mum and Elisa. She was so happy to see me!
The nurse arranged for an aunty (don’t know what’s her job title) to wheel me to the special care nursery and up to today, I am so angry at myself for not telling her off!
Elisa was walking next to me, holding my hands (she asked to hold my hands) while the aunty pushed me in a wheelchair. I’m not sure where she is rushing to, the aunty was pushing me at full speed!! And poor Elisa was literally running next to me, she had problem catching up!! I felt so sorry for Elisa and I am still very angry at myself for not speaking up!!
Anyway, when we reached the special care nursery, Elisa was asked to leave because children are not allowed. Again, I am pissed at the aunty because I’m sure she knows children are not allowed and yet she did not say anything. She quickly pushed me into the nursery and left!! I had no chance to explain to Elisa. C had to quickly bring her out while me and my mum went to see baby. I remember I was crying very badly in the nursery. The nurse consoled me thinking I was crying because of baby. But actually I was crying because I miss Elisa! And the sight of her squatting outside the glass door waiting for me broke my heart.
Knowing that baby is doing well and he is in good hands, I asked to leave. I knew my first-born needed me more than baby. She stuck to me the whole evening and I couldn’t be happier to be able to hold her properly and smothered her with kisses.
That night, I spent the night alone in the hospital. I barely slept as I had to be up every two hours to pump milk and I was worried about baby. And hungry!
Morning came and we gotten the all clear for baby to be discharged together with me! We went to pick Elisa up from school before heading home. She was thrilled to finally see her baby brother!
So, that’s the birth story of Ed. I certainly did not expect my gynae to be away on holiday and to have a nurse to deliver Ed (although we talked about it with my friends a lot of times). I did not expect Ed to have respiratory distress and had to be monitored in SCN. There were a lot of things that did not go as how I had pictured it to be. But you know what, they don’t matter. At the end of the day, what matters most is baby’s wellbeing. And he is doing great now 🙂